Cut a lemon in half. Put toe in lemon. Put sock over foot. Let soak overnight.
Soak in as hot of water you can stand and a good portion of Epsom salts. When the would is feeling a bit numb, find a tiny nail file and get down to the offensive bit of the nail that digs into your toe and gently file the nail upward (no sawing motions). Place foot back into the hot epsom water. When you remove your foot, dry well and apply a little Neosporin ointment between the nail and the skin and place a breathable (aka no plastic strips) bandage and change as necessary until healed. If you notice any signs of infection, get thyself to a doctor (wink)